18
May
09

Dane Cook, YouPorn, and the Peanut Butter Smack…how you like me now biznitch?

Ohhh what a weekend. I went to San Diego’s Sun God Festival and had an EPIC time. But that’s a story for later- I just watched Dane Cook‘s Isolated Incident on Comedy Central. I was a huge fan of Dane Cook’s early stuff, and though I’m not his biggest fan today, I still tuned in to see what he had.

Dane Cook’s material is based on the observation of what people do and say and why. He’s kind of a comedic sociologist- he talks about awkward situations, he talks about what everyone things but never says.

On a more serious note, he brought up a really great topic.

Many people in the past couple years have been trying to change the definition and gravity of the word “rape”.  I hear and see it so much, especially during Finals week, “Dude, I totally raped my bio final” or “omg, that paper raped me”.

Seriously?

Anyway the Dane train was talking about the commercial where Hillary Duff advocates against using the word “gay” as a synonym for “dumb” or “lame” (another one of my pet peeves). When I first saw the commercial, though I agree with the message, the commercial itself was meh.

He then made the parallel to how people were now trying to use the word “rape”. He noted how people kept using it online in the gaming world, like in WOW when they play online with others. “Dude, you shot me! Totally raped me!”

“Yeah, I’d like to sit down with a woman who has gone through that situation. If I ask her how she felt about the incident, she’s not going to look at me and go…have you ever played halo?”

Thank you Dane Cook.

If you’re a huge fan of the Dane Train, I recommend you don’t read on… because I pretty much talk about his material here on out.

He then went on to talk about one of my favorite sites on the wonderful world wide web: youporn.com. Some lines from that bit (note they’re not verbatim)

“I’ve read some of these porn titles and just thought ‘WTF does that mean? How do you go past ‘sparkle anus’ and not want to watch it? I’m on this site for hours and I haven’t touched myself once, I just need to read these titles.”

One of his favorite titles? “Blowjob…something to do”

Quite literally, according to Dane, a man is waiting there with his balls out, stark naked. A woman comes in, starts blowing, him… and abruptly leaves, saying “I have something to do”.

End video.

HAHAHAHA. Dane says, “What the fuck did she have to do? Jury duty? Online traffic school?”

Apparently there’s one called “the peanut butter smack“, regular sex for 14 minutes and 41 seconds, findng ending in a guy dipping his hand in a jar of peanut butter… and smacking his partner, then yelling “How you like me now, biznitch?”

The most food I’ve seen in a porn revolves around a couple playing with strawberries and whipped cream… At one point the man puts a strawberry into his partner’s pussy… and the video ends with him fishing it out…

and eating it.

HAHAHA. I watched it in a room full of people, and the reaction was HILARIOUS. If anyone finds that particular video, please send me the link! (I didn’t see the original on Youporn, so I doubt its there)

Anyway, bottom line: Dane and I watch the same porn. HOT.

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2 Responses to “Dane Cook, YouPorn, and the Peanut Butter Smack…how you like me now biznitch?”


  1. 1 Tru
    June 6, 2009 at 11:30 am

    Good point about the misuse of ‘rape’ – and lol @ the description of ‘Blowjob … something to do’. Not what I expected 🙂


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Welcome to sexandfood!

A blog written by a college gal on what she loves best: sex and food! Tell me what you think, drop me a comment or find me at misssexandfood@gmail.com :)

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